You stay completely paralyzed by fear, because it's a way to suffer less. When she was 13 years old, five local boys gang-raped her. The men were known as hooligans in the neighbourhood, but they never faced arrest. And they came back to her. To rape her several times. Amelia says that at that time in Galati, it was common to be raped. I was trapped by those threats and I could not do anything to get rid of the rapists.
Few girls turn in their attackers. When she was not with the men, locals in town would kick her and spit on her.
I had the label of 'whore' because I was raped at Being a good girl was out of reach. I was afraid of telling my parents, in case they rejected me. So I was isolated. And I think the same happens to other girls [in the same situation]. There were a lot of us, but we were scattered, not having a relationship between one another. Because it was shameful. Despite a desire to study, Amelia left school, and, at 14, started working in a car-wash, then in a shop sewing clothes.
It was easier to cope with. At the bottom of your heart you do not want it, but it is a way to protect yourself.
But it was not a real empowerment. I did not live my sexuality, but the sexuality of others. Because it is so painful to realise that we are victims.
